Last night was really amazing! Well, ironically I appreciated it so much more quite simply because of the night before's experience.
Thursday night I went to a group activity that was something I used to be a part of. It was true that the people there were nice as they knew how to be. But I wasn't looking for polite conversation and a social smile, I was looking for a connection and a laugh. It was strange because I'd remembered vaguely what that old group was generally like, but I had diminished it in my mind since I'd left. One of the big things was the struggle to utterly conform to a set of rules or placing so much value on what others think that you conform to what you think they want you to be. And then once you get there you get depressed because you feel boring and unoriginal, but otherwise you'd feel awkward and different, so you can't go back without a fight.
Then last night...:~) I went to a game night with my bible study and... (there were people there also that did not know me) I guess instead of being awed at how different I was, there was a general acceptance.
I know how to put it! They loved me for my weirdness instead of despite of my oddities. That was the big difference. And if I happened to be normal on something, they loved me for that as well. There was no pressure to conform. And no pressure to specifically try and be different. And on the other hand, I loved them for themselves. Odd, crazy, normal people that they are.
