It was fun. Like a group of friends... Oh, I guess they have become my friends. Not just like friends, they actually are my friends. (Not used to that yet) We talked serious and laughed and talked serious and laughed. But one of the serious subjects that came up was the path to my baptism. The groups had been talking about when to confront someone about faith and when to wait and not push. That's when I explained a little more of my story.
I told them how I'd been questioning for a long time. And sometimes I would begin to feel like I'd found the truth. I was so close and then I'd get chased off by what they'd say when the Lord didn't prompt them to speak. Things like, "You're wrong and going to Hell if you don't act fast," or "I'm glad you came, maybe we can get your whole family to see the light next." This happened time after time. Not just Christianity, but all sorts of religions. I'd feel like I was getting somewhere and then it was mercilessly stuffed down my throat.
And then on the other hand, there was Carol. It didn't come up immediately. I knew pretty quick that she was religious and was wary about our friendship. To be honest, I was trying to enjoy our time together before the stuffing religion down my throat routine began. But she didn't. She only spoke when she felt prompted to and in turn I found the truth without being scared off.
Then Jessica said, "Well, that makes me wonder. I mean God's obviously been shutting those doors over and over again before you were led to the right place. So, it'll be interesting to see what you are supposed to do with those experiences. What you were supposed to learn."
I paused to think for a second, but it came to me what one of the biggest lessons was. "Total acceptance," I said. "I knew what rejection was. I know what it's like to be shunned from a group over and over for stupid reasons. So, I don't do that to others. That's why my baptism was so controversial. I mean, I have friends in all faiths and they know how accepting I am, so they were afraid that that would change."
"Besides, I'm such a different creature, that I never really fit in any sort of conforming group. So, the result ended up being that everyone wanted me in their 'in' group. Go figure. I never understood it, but when we had us/them group problems at the hotels between the immigrants, Americans, and foreign exchange all of them included me as part of their group, even as they hated the other groups."
We laughed for a while afterwards about other things, but I continued to think about what all I'd learned from rejection. How I'd learned that love was the only thing that mattered. Especially Agape, or the unconditional stuff. And that who someone was mattered and who they projected they were didn't. And how if you ignore the lines, then they hold no power over you.
After all, love is God's power and nothing can beat that.
